Hello we are Jeanette Merilyn Melissa and Caroline from Cedar basketball.

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Joline!
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December 2006 / January 2007 / February 2007 / March 2007 / April 2007 / May 2007 / June 2007 / July 2007 / August 2007 / September 2007 / October 2007 / November 2007 / December 2007 / January 2008 / February 2008 / March 2008 / April 2008 / May 2008 / June 2008 / July 2008 / August 2008 / September 2008 / October 2008 / November 2008 / December 2008 / January 2009 / February 2009 / March 2009 /

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The world needs to be a happier place.

Well, at least the world around me.


I'm currently void of any emotions.

,merilyn
you chose CY - your Enneagram type is SIX (aka "The Loyalist").

"I am affectionate and skeptical"

Questioners are responsible, trustworthy, and value loyalty to family, friends, groups, and causes. Their personalities range broadly from reserved and timid to outspoken and confrontative.

How to Get Along with Me
Be direct and clear.
Listen to me carefully.
Don't judge me for my anxiety.
Work things through with me.
Reassure me that everything is OK between us.
Laugh and make jokes with me.
Gently push me toward new experiences.
Try not to overreact to my overreacting.

What I Like About Being a SIX
being committed and faithful to family and friends
being responsible and hardworking
being compassionate toward others
having intellect and wit
being a nonconformist
confronting danger bravely
being direct and assertive

What's Hard About Being a SIX
the constant push and pull involved in trying to make up my mind
procrastinating because of fear of failure; having little confidence in myself
fearing being abandoned or taken advantage of
exhausting myself by worrying and scanning for danger
wishing I had a rule book at work so I could do everything right
being too critical of myself when I haven't lived up to my expectations

SIXes as Children Often
are friendly, likable, and dependable, and/or sarcastic, bossy, and stubborn [ha!]
are anxious and hypervigilant; anticipate danger
form a team of "us against them" with a best friend or parent
look to groups or authorities to protect them and/or question authority and rebel
are neglected or abused, come from unpredictable or alcoholic families, and/or take on the fearfulness of an overly anxious parent

hahaha. too true too true.
okay. today will be the last time i'm online.
stop slacking jeanette.
Yoohoo, 1 paper down. Dont think it was very well done, but no point dwelling, so... : )

Havent really been blogging but eh look at Caroline and Melissa. Haha, i'm not the worse. This place is like getting boring by the minute. : /

I find that no matter how much i sleep, i still feel like sleeping. : / (random) how? it occurs whenever i flip open the books or stare at the notes, my eyelids naturally slide down and down-er. Ahhhhh, i need to sleep less.

My life's been the norm. But i sure gotta study moreee in this period.

Anyways, people around today were like having ups and downs. I do hope everything's fine now. Aiyaaa i'm like gonna say death is something very un-understandable and everyone's gonna go like so common. But the thought of death really brings about lots of thinking and emotions. I want my grandparents forever, esp my grandma. I see her like every weekend. Okay shhhh abt this, dont wanna start feeling nyeh.

It has been damn easy to cry this year. Veryyyyy.

Okay this post damn random everything's flying around in my head and i'm typing whatever that comes to mind.

I feel like my life's lacking somthing(s). : (

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. No mood.

Feel like sleeping again.

Quite nyeh. : (

seeya pigs
,merilyn
today, was quite a sucky day. as expected.

english paper was rather crap, for once in my life. compo was scribbles, i bet it's like completely incoherent. compre was harrddddd. damn.

talked at 3p after the paper, said alot of what was on my mind. okay, mainly gossip really, which is kinda bad. hahaha. ohwells, it was kinda fun, laughed alot. haven't really talked like this in ages.

went to mrs ng's funeral after that, the teachers were all so nice. couldn't look at her face, and kw was abit unstable so we both just quickly walked past. then we got emotional while walking out cause the card was just so... heartpain. and then kw & i just started bawling, esp when we started thinking about our grandmothers ohmygosh. thought about horrible things i said, felt like shit. it took me a while to calm down actually.

then after that went to subway to eat, i think the poor guy must have thought i was positively retarded. i bet i was the weirdest customer he ever met.

"and what sauce would you want?"

"huh. anything lah. you help me choose."

-stares.

ohwells. at least i got my lunch.

the overall mood went up after that, me kw mer caroline. many many people came in and out to talk to us, quite funny. then suddenly mood went super nyehh, so we just sat down there and stoned for the longest time.

quite alot of things happened actually, but my headache's really bad so i shall not bother. just hope everybody's in a better mood now, cheer up people. (: thankfully i'm quite okay now, thought through quite alot of things on the way home.

okay, dinnertime.
-nette.
oceans apart, day after day
and i slowly go insane
i hear your voice, on the line
and it doesn't stop the pain
if i see you next to never,
how can we say forever?

wherever you go
whatever you do
i will be right her waiting for you
whatever it takes
or how my heart breaks
i will be right here waiting for you

----

amazing, how circumstances that initially look so promising don't go your way and all you can do it mope and groan and feel frustrated about it.

and it's at times like these that make you wanna scream.

first thing my friends said to me today was,"jeanette are you okay?" hahaha. they said i looked like i was gonna cry. hahahaha. funny. i didn't, don't worry. too stoned throughout the whole day to feel anything hahaha.

ohwells. gotta go back to studying.

& suddenly i want my canon in d boyfriend to appear in front of me,to pull me away into the pretty pretty sunset. and make everything perfect again.

haha.
-nette.

Haha and this stupid sound clip by Caroline. Laugh okay! I like alot. :D



merilyn
TAN KOR WOONG, aka The Brat,

Happy 15th Birthday!

Sorry I couldnt make it to night safari, I'm so sad I missed the 'hey qiming, you wanna play'! Sorry yeah, never really clebrate with you, i'm feeling quite bad! Anyways, I guess and hope you're having fun now. : D Update me on your birthday on Monday yeah? Hope your meet-up with stilts people will be love too!

You've been a great great friend and like a big part of my school life. Even in primary school we werent that close but for these almost-3 years in Cedar, my every single day was kinda not lived past without you being a brat around me (okay, do not count the NUMEROUS days you were absent from school), plus all that talks about the big and small incidents/events/gossips. And the times we spend in the car feeling happy, excited, down, emo, sad, tired, irritated, angry (plus whatever else you can think of) while on the way to school. Your stupid comments and when you laugh about things that are not funny at all, like seriously. Your tongue entangle moments, resulting in ridiculous new words never heard before. The recent study dates and outings.

But i wanna tell you that i'll always be there for you to show me black face/long face if you're feeling like shit, even if it's the first thing i'll see when i get into the car for a brand new school day. (haha) Dont be sad or sorry for your recent mood swings, i guess it's inevitable for what you're going through, i understand! : D And i'm still happy that you dont mind talking/writing to me when you're mute.

I hope your birthday wish comes true, though i dont think i know what it is. Stay a happy brat, a trouble-free one too! Hope the mood-swings dont swing too much and everything takes place nicely so that you'll be less unhappy. : ) Esp this period kinda like hectic and you became super sad. Study hard for bloody end years okay! One day we shall scare the irritating Coffee Bean people with Andrea okay! : D

Okay.. that seems quite alot. To sum it all up,

I LOVE YOU! : ] Have fun on this special 16th!

seeya pigs
,merilyn!
words i don't wanna say, but continuously echo in my mind. i think, i'm just gonna wait. and see what happens. i'm still gonna be here, and it'll all turn out good anyways,

even if suddenly it seems everything's crashing down at the same time. when it rains, it seriously pours. i'm feeling blank now, trying to keep everything to the corners of my mind so i won't have to think about it. i guess i'm always in a studying mood nowadays cause books make my life simple & straightforward.

gosh, i need to run. desperately.

okay, no more emo momo i'm not even feeling anything. anything other than a i-need-to-go-back-to-ss mood. i'm gonna fill my head with nothing but studies for the next three weeks. (:

i guess breaks are quite good, they clear your mind to let more sensible thoughts get in.
okay whatever, this is getting random.

oh yay, my mood's better now. (: oh oh tammy wong remember the badge pact ohkay! the monday-badge-thing. hahahhaha.

i think i can go past 2plus today. wheeeeee.
-nette.

cause baby i will wait for you
cause there's nothing else that i can do.

hmmm, a note to everybody: CHEER UP PEOPLE! (: to all those to wake up on the wrong side of life every morning, and come to school with the blackest face ever, we gotta stay strong. cause when life throws us lemons, we take them, have lots of fun playing with them, and then we make the sweetest lemonade possible with them. agreed?


so.

woke up in one of the worst moods this morning, it all started last night when i screwed with my sim card and the pin number and then i got it blocked what a brilliant person i am. so i went around the whole day without a phone, liberating but felt as if something was missing.

haha, no surprise there.

got an entire piece of foolscap of my thoughts for today, dont think i'll be looking at it again anytime soon, but don't think i'll be throwing it away either.

bleah.

so my mum had to go change to another sim card for me, which means i lost a million numbers (whew the impt ones were still there.) and a bunch of other stuff. i'm not really sure i mind losing the other stuff.. ohwells, they're lost anyways, and i'm not gonna get them back so i should just forget it. i've got others too anyways.

studied with claudia after school today, laughed alot. (: realised i've studied with different people everyday, quite fun actually.

been walking around with a sense of hopelessness about everything, seems like i'm doing stuff just for the sake of it, or not doing anything at all. sometimes it's just too tiring to open your mouth when you know you'll have a thousand other sentences shooting straight back at you when you do. it feels like trying to move mount everest with a stick.

wwjd?

-nette.

Bloody hell. I need to rant.

I dont know if it was all triggered by that bloody phone call or whatever crap, you all come talk to me and be nice like how it never used to be. Like seriously, nothing's wrong with me, i'm hanging out with the correct people and blah, for god's sake. Stop thinking like i'm some problem kid facing the wrong stuffs out there and turning rotten. Hello? Stop making me feel like shit that one day i'll not feel like coming back, at all.

Ahhh crap,fcuk.

Today was relatively fun, and Jeanette thanks for being able to make it there with me! Had fun just plain talking on the way there. Was quite crappy tryin to get everyone's answers the whole morning and like everyone took eons to just confirm sth.

Had fun with kw, jedi, chantal and the rest. Did the craziest things on th bus. Was quite stoned after that, at th last part. I dont know. Left with chantal. Loves.

I've got like lots of things to get off my chest, dont know who to turn to.
Ohmy, damn irritated. With everything.

seeya pigs
,merilyn
i just wanna scream and lose control
throw my hands up and let it go
forget about everything and run away, yeah
i just wanna fall and lose myself
laughing so hard it hurts like hell
forget about everything and run away, yeah.

--

boo.

okay today was kinda fun, compared to the endless days i've spent at home studying.

went to watch kw! on stilts woohoo. cameo-ed there actually, but at least i got to see her perform abit. quite cool, didn't expect so many people to come. and and i only have one thing to say: i dont know why but i dont understand art. HAHA. repeated this many many times to merilyn today. okay i understand some art i suppose, like the kites looked really nice flying together in the sky today. but other than that.. nah. art is beyond me.

talked about alot of stuff to merilyn on the way to west coast (it is seriously on the other end of singapore btw) okay, we gossiped quite a bit too. hehs. thanks for listening mer. (: needed to get some stuff off my chest, felt quite good.

and my eyes have been red for the past two days or so, really itchy can't stop scratching. now they look like they're either bleeding or i've just had a really good cry. =/ kinda sore too, hope they'll be okay by tomorrow.

okay i shall go watch the all blacks pummel the italians somemore. hahaha.
-nette.

woohoo! :D

this has got to be the boring-est holiday of my entire life.

i wanna go out, someone date me pleease? even if it's to go out study, i can't stand the sight of my desk anymore.

OH. tkw's doing stilts on sat! (((:

watched ratatouille last night, fantastic show. there was nothing wrong with the movie, but i have to complain about this fat idiot who was beyond irritating and who kept laughing at every. single. thing in the show. and he might as well have been telling people within a 1000m radius of him what the show was about, cause he'd be saying what was happening in every scene like we were a bunch of idiots who couldn't understand a PG show. i bet everyone in the cinema could hear what he said. and i just haddd to be the poor unfortunate soul to sit right next to him. bleah.

but the show was nice. (:

sigh.

okay i shall go back to watching trailers now.
-nette.
Okay. Felt like, then didnt feel like, and now i feel like blogging.

Past days were mainly math lessons back at school. Chem Spa surprisingly was manageable. So much for getting sooo freaked out. -_-

Andandand not to forget studying with chantal, jedi and line(1/2 of the time).

Studying with yall has been much fun. :D Would prolly end up doing nothing at all if i was at home. And getting pissed off for not getting The seats, haha. Hope tmr will be a better day for studying!

Ohmy, my hair needs some getting used to.

I clearly and surely think i'm over it.
Please dont let anything happen to change my mind. I feel so stupid. : /

seeya pigs
,merilyn


hey people.

okay weather report! it's freezing with a capital F now, i feel like i'm cold inside & out. haha. my fingers are dying, getting numb alr. bleahh.

did chem today, and i realised that staying at home studying the whole day can really make you die of boredom. hahaha. at least tomorrow i'll be out for a while, even if it's to do spa. =/ but i study better at home anyways, & there's always my bed if i need a break.

thought about a lot of random stuff today, like i can be reading notes on titration and i'll start thinking about other stuff which will lead to other stuff which will lead to something which has completely no link to titration. ha. ha. and i'm wayy too lazy to type out what thoughts, i think i've forgotten alr anyways. hmmm.

okay, i'm totally spacing out in front of the com, shall go back to my titration notes. they make more sense.

it felt almost like before. and when i saw it i smiled just a little bit more. (:

& i suddenly feel like screaming & shouting & singing & yelling at the top of my voice, and jumping and dancing around like a crazy idiot. it'd be quite fun wouldn't it?

LA DI DA DI DA.

-nette.
cause all of the stars
have faded away
just try not to worry
you'll see them someday.

-nette.
hey people.

random: jenny is pretty! until she gets to the office part, then she starts looking badd. but she's still pretty.. kinda reminds me of katie leung but jenny's so much prettier. (:

firstcor13. this made me change my perspective about everything. & i'm so glad it did.

siann, holidays starting = studying had better start as well. ): well, at least i get to wake up late. and i think i'll be doing alot of work at night so... i think i'll need some sweets to keep me company! fruitips & mentos & CHOCOLATE ESPECIALLY. hhahaha. okay then i'll really grow fat. & my stamina can go wheee down the drain. hahaha.

& suddenly i wonder how this year's last day of school will be like. compared to last year. or last last. okay it's not so much the last day of school, but the first day of next year.

okay i'm thinking too much, lets get through endyears first. hahaha.

nights people, sleep tight. (:
-nette.

edited:
okay i'm so utterly grossed out by some things now, like seriously. ew ew ew? how can people think i'm actually like THAT. ew.... okay. maybe if they didn't know me they'd think like that.. but please, that's so gross. yuck.
I wanna cut bangs.

I dont like my home now, a little bit.

Chicken biscuits are yummy. Anyone wanna go out study?
-waves frantically.
boredddd at home.

and chicken nuggets are part of my daily diet. : D

randomrandomrandom

Time to forget about everything soon, quite set. : (
Haha.

seeya pigs
,merilyn



this is insane.

our dearrrrrrrrrr emceeee

when it comes to call, she wont forsake me.

melvin gay wah grew taller.

peishi?